I gotta retype. Just because my computer kena hanged... -_-"

Just now while I was typing, I felt tremors. It's the earthquake in Indonesia JUST NOW. LIVE!!! I was shocked, and I felt super dizzy. woahz...1st-hand experience of earthquake for me yeah! However, I didn't really like the feeling, 'coz it made me very giddy, and I hate that feeling. It makes me feel sick. ULGH!! I just hope that most of the Indonesians over there can survive this ordeal...*pRAy* I'm really upset about the world now...Everytime I watch the news, about 80% would be bad news-disasters, accidents, deaths...HORROR! What is the world becoming like??? Why am I still here not trying my best to help??? There's more work to be done................................

Last night, I was sorting out some of my neoprints and browsing through some of my pictures in my computer...And they made me recollect my past, a past that I'll never forget. It made me regret for the whole of my life...of coz, I've moved on with life, but I just can't help it but feel EMO once again...I'm not ashamed to say it out, 'coz I think I need to share what I've gone through, something that I advice you people out there never to do it, especially teenagers around my age, regardless of your gender.

I was...........

Like this...........

YEAR 2003:

This is me (at the bottom-right), when I was Sec. 2. Taken in Aug 2003.

Me (left) with Yvonne. Taken in Nov 2003. (can you spot my bony neck?)

YEAR 2004:

With my cousins and sis at Sentosa-Siloso Beach. Taken in Jun 2004.

Jia Xuan, my dear choir junior, and me. Taken in Oct 2004.

My cousins and sis and me. Forgot when it was taken. hee! =x

At Ubin, with sis - religious class outing. =)

YEAR 2005:

Yiling and me, Best friends for life! =D Taken in Jun 2005.

Cousins, me and sis. Taken in Dec 2006 as well...

At one of my cousin's wedding dinner. Taken on 13 Jan 07. (HA! I remembered!!! =P)

Realised how I've changed?

That's what I wish to say...

I was..............................

.......................

ANOREXIC.

yupps. And I've overcome the fear and embarrassment of being an 'EX-anorexian'. I just hope that people will continue to live their life normally, find their happiness in life, and to be able to appreciate everything in their life, especially to love themselves. Loving youself is the most important thing, if you want to love others or love the things around you. I almost landed in hospital because of extreme dieting...It started in Sec. 2, you see...And my life was like HELL. I'm telling the truth. I just don't wish history to repeat itself ever again. I'm happy with what I am now.

Want to know the secret to my success? (I meant to live on like now...)

My NEVER-ENDING support and encouragement from my family and friends. My family, especially mum, dad and sis...They all gave me little words of encouragement...forced-fed me with food...I remembered I'd always notice my mum having red, teary eyes (no tears dropping down lah...) whenever I glanced at her. I remembered my friends telling me, 'You're too skinny, and you don't look very nice already.' And after I put on some weight, they all told me,'You look prettier now, and you should continue to work hard.'

I felt pretty lonely during the period of anorexia. It was horrible. I remembered I didn't really have any friends who actually came up to look for me, but I had to go around looking for friends. I even asked one of them,'Why are you avoiding me?' She replied uncomfortably, afraid to offend me,'That's because you've changed...Your behaviour...Your entire self. You're not the same Sharine as I've always liked to be with.' I was truly upset. No, I didn't blame her, but I questioned myself,'Why? Why have I changed?' My temper became hotter, worser, and I felt weak mentally. I couldn't even take a minor change in my life. I wanted everything to be PERFECT. Right...I was a perfectionist then, maybe it's due to my dieting, that I wanted to know that I could handle my weight problems......

I'm glad I'm back to normal now. I'm much happier than before. Even though the scar of this memory is still etched in my mind, I'm sure I've learnt a wonderful lot of lesson, and I don't regret anymore. I have to live on, just like successful people who live their life to their fullest.

I just want to say:
I LOVE DAD, MUM, SIS, BRO, MY BEST FRIENDS - YILING, NADZ, YVONNE, COUSINS, RELATIVES, RELIGIOUS CLASS FRIENDS, ALL THE PEOPLE IN MY LIFE......LOVE YOU ALL VERY MUCH!!!!!! ^_^

I'm glad...

Thanks for taking your time to finish reading this entry. =D