I just want to type out this post before I sleep, because when I get up in the morning, I can't remember much of what I want to share anymore...

I was chatting online tonight as usual.
It's always the best times to chat, so peaceful... so calming... the slowing down of time after the end of each day... It's the best time for me to blog. No distraction. No interruption.

I had so much to learn and experience from my friends tonight, especially hearing from A's greatest loss... I was so shocked, really. She has been such a wonderful friend that I thought we were once one of the best of friends. I miss those times together.

And now, knowing this news from her, I was so affected. I wanted to be by her side so much, to give her a big bear hug, to share her tears, to go through the pain together... I felt very much for her. Losing a loved one is really painful, especially someone who's taken care of us ever since we're just an embryo in the womb to begin with.

B lost her valuable as it was being stolen.
Losing something so expensive is not a good feeling...indeed.

C had so much trouble over emotions, just like I had mine recently.
I saw myself in her, especially the past few months of torture that I had gone through.
Now I became her sort-of "mentor". How ironic.

D was troubling over her kin being hospitalised, and she was very upset.
Someone so dear being warded in the hospital bed makes one very moody and down.
Every moment is spent thinking and worrying about the loved one still in hospital and hasn't recovered.
It's a heavy feeling.

Grief, loss, death and bereavement.
I might consider going into this field in future.
I felt so much for people who've lost.
I wish so much to cry with them... to share their burdens and sorrows... to journey with them during the process of grieving...

Life's transient, and the only thing that doesn't change is CHANGE itself.

Recently, I've heard about people near me being hospitalized.
Somehow, such things are getting nearer to me in my life... Is this a message for me?
I hope that I can stop being lazy and do something about it.

Don't know why I've been slightly upset these days, probably focused too much on one thing and neglecting many other aspects of my life.

I suddenly don't feel like going for Honours year anymore...
Life's more than just books and papers.
Experience and hands-on learning are much, much, much more valuable to me than books and readings, because it shapes my character even harder.

I'm always scared of going through huge things and responsibilities, of going out into the real world, of facing everyday's life challenges, but it seems like these have all become part of my life. I've no more time to feel so scared about all these heavy workload anymore.
It's time to stop being a daddy's girl and stand up for myself. Yes, I need someone to dote and love me, but I don't need someone to come and protect me because when I fall, I learn the most in knowing how to stand back up again, with my tears wiped clean.

It's time for me to go back to the place where I always spend my lone time with God.
I'm excited, actually. (: